The Back Office Consortium Conspiracy

Everyone loves a good conspiracy theory. I, on the other hand, am the most incredulous person there is – if you can’t prove it (and hopefully with numbers), I just don’t believe you. But that doesn’t mean I can’t throw a conspiracy theory of my own out there, if just for shits and giggles.

A report was just released that says that 83% of all email network traffic is garbage, meaning bad stuff like vanilla email malformations and denial of service attacks. So only 17% of all resources are used for actual useful communications.

How fricken convenient for all the hardware and software products providers for back office operations! Sounds like they’d be selling a helluva lot less gear if these problems didn’t exist.

But…

What if the DoS attacks, directory harvesting and all the other garbage were actually a concerted effort among the purveyors of these products – a coordination of attacks by covert operatives (out-of-work network administrators) stationed in faraway places (like next door to Chinese military installations), using equipment supplied to them by big hardware companies (who are supposed to be in the computer business, but distract the masses by pushing half-baked consumer electronics instead).

The kingpins of the group would, of course, be the security companies. Sooner or later they have to solve whatever problem the online world faces, or they fall out of favor too quickly and the consortium fractures. Note that these problems didn’t exist in near the magnitude when hardware and software was flying off the shelves for the next dot-bomb. And security companies didn’t have near the profile they do now either.

Of course, it is just a crazy theory, and even I don’t believe it. Just thought it best to throw it out there before someone who does, does.

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