Tag: Bruce Smithhammer

Behind the hoo-haa: Snake River edition

YOURS TRULY: No need to pack the beads, eh?

THE FARCEUR: What the heck are you doing even possessing beads?

YOURS TRULY: Well, they are useful in transition month tailwaters.

THE FARCEUR: Quit rattling that box – it’s giving me a headache.

Making the run from Wilson to South Park, behind the guides and their clients all giddyup’ed in waders and vests and waxed canvas hats wondering why they are sweating their butts off and blaming the manufacturers of their recently purchased kit. Picking off everything they missed, which in local parlance means almost every denizen of the deep anxious to pound #4 attractors with abandon reserved for spring openers. Seeing just one other drift boat, five hundred yards ahead. Carrying on between ourselves such that bystanders would think we were sworn enemies, until bellows of laughter filled the air.

snake river cutthroat

Fitz stole the show, then graciously opted to row.

Rolling behind the hoo-haa was an incomparable way to end a week already marked by big wins.

MG signing off (because the mission has only just begun)

Alex Kong vs. Smithzilla

Hollywood has run out of ideas, so fly-fishing compadres are picking up the slack. As if competing against a bunch of gangsters during Carp Slam wasn’t enough, I am now forced to contend with bonafide monsters overtaking my humble abode just a few short weeks from now.

It’s a clash that is sure to wow theoretical physicists, the paparazzi, and dogs and cats alike:

Alex Kong

King Kong

…versus Smithzilla.

I thought about buying a catastrophic insurance policy, but instead I’m just taking bets on who gets the sofa.

MG signing off (because the house is supposed to always win, although in this case it’s questionable)

Get to know the beast within, and get yourself some free fly-fishing magazines

drakemagThere is a ferocious beast living in Eastern Idaho. Locals call him Smithzilla, but the world of fly-fishing publications refers to him simply as Bruce Smithhammer. He’s an ornery critter, with razor sharp vision and even more finely-tuned claws, a complete package for the elegant pursuit of steelhead with spey gear down and dirty carp hunting treachery.

Outward appearances aside, Smithzilla is an infinitely complex creature, prone to reciting Pericles, Prince of Tyre while scraping radioactive waste off his boots, sometimes even with his mouth full of leaded chukar. In other words, he’s worth knowing, and I’m here to make sure you do.

The game is simple: answer the following questions about Smithzilla in the comments section; the entrant with the most right answers will receive the five (5) most recent back issues of The Drake Magazine, of which Smithzilla is a frequent contributor. That’s a prize package worth at least…uh…something (since I won’t even send you a 1099)!

1) What significant body of water has Smithzilla kayaked across?

2) Prior to becoming a fishing guide, what else did Smithzilla guide?

3) What is the weirdest thing that Smithzilla has ever eaten?

4) Why does Smithzilla have six screws in his leg?

5) What is the weirdest thing that Smithzilla has ever landed on a fly rod?

I will provide answers to these mysterious questions one week hence, and will be the sole judge of the winner. How you obtain the answers is completely up to you, but please note that factual correctness will not necessarily be deemed “right”. Think of it like a political debate, just without the bad hairpieces. Additionally, be prepared to provide your mailing address directly to me so you can receive your prize.

MG signing off (to spin the Wheel. Of. Fortune.)

Disclaimer: This contest is neither sponsored nor endorsed by The Drake Magazine, its owners, employees, or contributors. The prizes were not pilfered from a fly shop bathroom either.

Denver faces imminent destruction

The Smithzilla is coming!

OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Two men enter. Three men leave.

Losing count of the number of fish you caught is usually a sign that things are going pretty well. Forgetting how many double hookups you had means it probably got downright silly.

With almost two hours remaining until lunch, Bruce Smithhammer and I debated pulling out the Sage Xi3 7 wt/6080 reel combo we’d carried along to test. Then we just handed it to the guide.

All we know for certain is that by day’s end we wound up with eight TRIPLES – even more ridiculous because we chased barracuda almost exclusively between noon and three.

And nabbed one of those too!

Deneki FIBFest host Andrew Bennett, along with his right hand men Rick Sisler and Matt Hynes, said South Andros Island bonefish weren’t too particular about their food. But heck, they’re even eating my flies! And so darn frequently that I’m starting to run out.

The MG Cudaceivers I tied are another matter – they were specifically designed for single use.

MG signing off (to scrounge up a tying vise)