Tag: fly fishing guides

Miss April Vokey: The Consummate Entertainer

She may say she’s made the grade because she rebuffed the “Barbie Doll in Waders” label, or that she simply loves it more than anyone she knows…

But I believe that’s all a pile of made-for-television spin. Having spent some time fishing with the gal, I think Miss April rises above the froth because she’s the consummate entertainer. A true professional, and yet never a dull moment, from the time you step into the truck until the point you pour the first drink (she prefers Jack Daniels by the way), pure unadulterated fun. Throw deadly skills into the mix (which she has), and you get one of the best fishing experiences you can fathom.

Guides far and wide could learn a thing or two from this lady by watching the 60 Minutes Sports expose airing tonight on Showtime. I don’t even own a television, but I already know the story.

Or maybe I’m just pissed she’s going to be booked for forever and a day now, and I won’t ever again get to hear her say “Hey Gracie, want another quesadilla?”

April Vokey Cooking

MG signing off (because attitude is just about everything, and April’s is simply angelic beyond compare)

Listening on the Reunion Tour

Kirk Deeter and I were paired up again today. The Rolling Stone is a colossally fine angler, and I’m just a fair listener. In other words, we had a hell of a time. I know, I just lost you.

Our guide Josie Sands noted early on that the conditions were the most difficult a bonefish-chasing fly angler might ever face in his or her life. The water was so skinny that Vanity Fair wouldn’t bother photoshopping it; the light so flat that Hugh Hefner would have taken a pass too. All you get are tails, and they often disappear in the blink of an eye.

So listen to your mentor-for-a-day, and listen well. If he says start false casting and don’t drop the fly until he gives the ok, don’t ask any questions. The guides at Andros South know precisely what they are doing, so you do as you are told. And for goodness sakes, don’t blink!

You might get fair to midland results from this advice…

MG signing off (to listen to another, as the stakes just went up)

What Fly Fishing Retailer is really all about

Some say it’s about camaraderie, pressing palms with folks you’ve only ever corresponded with via email or phone. For others, it’s about cutting a few deals, picking up another line or getting your product in that shop. If you were at Bubba Gumps on Thursday night, you’d think it was about the ten pounds of boiled shrimp you ate. And if you rode with me to the Drake Film Awards you might have thought it was about all the stuff you left in my truck right after someone started calling for shots and I smartly exited stage left.

But what it’s really all about is watching professional fly fishing guides trying to pick up the best looking server at the Strata Bar, and failing miserably at least getting a chance picture out of it.

What was her name again?

Bad pickup lines, boys and girls. It’s about building up a veritable arsenal of bad pickup lines.