Tag: Madoff

Fly fishing is the world’s biggest Ponzi scheme

Diehard fly-fishers already know this

First, you mortgage your life for a collection of very expensive gear. Before you’ve gotten any return on your investment, you get all your friends involved and they buy sloughs of pricey rods and reels. They soon find the sport is a lot more difficult than it looks, so to soothe their sore shoulders (not from casting – it’s the chip on said shoulder causing the pain) they lure yet more people to fly fishing. In turn more high-priced graphite and aluminum wonders exit the shop.

Along the way millions of leaders are broken, billions of indicators and egg weights come loose, and trillions of flies are snagged on overhanging tree branches and mangrove roots. ┬áIf you’re lucky, someone in your long line of friends wants to get involved and happens to have more money than you – they buy all the gear you can’t afford (and then you just borrow it).

To hell with all the rhetoric about getting back to nature, having time to reflect, converging with zen states of being – fly fishing is the most aggravating thing a human being can do. The only way anyone involved in the insanity ever gets a return on their investment is…uh…well…they won’t. Never will. A slight consolation is that if you take really, really good care of your gear you might be able to pass it on to your progeny.

We are all suckers.

Anyone reading this who actually fly fishes more than once a decade is now concurring wholeheartedly. And as irony would have it, some folks intimately related to Madoff Investments own part of Abel reels – Singlebarbed and Moldy Chum have more.

What I really take offense to is the notion of Madoff Investments being history’s biggest Ponzi scheme. It’s fly fishing, dammit, and I am in possession of shit loads of AMEX statements to prove it.

Now where’s my bailout?